I'm in search of an attractive lad who can make me feel special in bed. Someone who'll jackhammer me the way I want it. I'm not saying that you can't make your dark fantasies come true when you're with me. All I'm saying is that it'd be fun to meet a...

I am not the one you're looking for because I am way beyond your standards. I know this may sound like I am boasting, but I am just stating some facts here. If you are curious what made me say such things, then don't hesitate to send me a message.

For most girls, great eyebrows are life. As for me, great eyebrows, food, and heavenly sex are what put a big smile on my pretty face. I can stay in my bedroom for the whole 24 hours getting off with a handsome bloke.

I'm chatty and that's what makes me friendly. I'm a great conversationalist you can talk with for hours. Let me just make it clear that I'm not single and available. What I'm looking for is a friend who's fun to be with.

Me: 30-year-old female with a generally positive outlook on life, living alone, no piercing, zero tattoos, one car, one cat, and one (slightly used) vagina.

I can't settle with one kind of sex every time a man fucks me. I don't think it's worthwhile being dribbled when it's the same kind of technique. A variety is necessary to keep the flame burning for years to come.